September 21 2008
Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains
I’m not surprised that this movie slipped me by until now, and I can only imagine the impression it would have had on my pre-teen mind in 1981. The film slams together several musical archetypes that weren’t on my radar in the days of early MTV. Acid rock glam geezers clash with snotty young British punks in a tour bus driven by a reggae loving Rastafarian. Overshadowing them all is a Shaggs-quality trio of small town girls. Their quick rise to fame and idolization by legions of look-alike “skunks” seems inexplicable considering their lack of talent, drummer, records, or even songs in the plural. Especially in a world where far less confrontational new wave and arena rock ruled the radio.
Diane Lane, Laura Dern and Marin Kanter play the proto-riot grrls, teenage runaways caught up in a whirlwind of sensationalism and on-the-road misery. Amateur status aside, they’re the most colorful thing to hit the towns they play. Bored newscasters and frustrated young feminists can’t get enough of them. Neither can the singer of tour mates The Looters, whose tough veneer melts for the trio’s disaffected leader Corinne “Third Degree” Burns.
Director Lou Adler (executive producer of The Rocky Horror Picture Show and producer of The Care Bears Movie) doesn’t do a whole lot to make this an exciting trip. Pennsylvania’s post-industrial landscapes are cold and drab. The backstage shenanigans are as dead as the OD’d guitarist for The Metal Corpses. Despite their media-fueled exploitation and meteoric rise to stardom the Stains just seem along for the ride. There’s plenty of piss and vinegar boiling in the characters but nothing to really toss it at.
Still, the raw look and spirit of independence comes through and dares to say that girls don’t always just wanna have fun. Unlike many of its music movie peers it plays it real with tunes and characters provided by ex-members of The Sex Pistols, The Clash and The Tubes. Even the supposedly happy ending comes off as questionable and ironic, challenging the audience to consider whether success is worth selling out your ideals and message for. The Fabulous Stains is far from perfect, but I’d take it any day over Madonna’s movie romps as a model of the time.
